1. Take individual moments from games and use them as proof for your point. But avoid seeing these in context. So if a player makes a bad pass just before the opposition score, focus on that, blame him for the goal, and ignore anything else he did in the game. Keep the whole argument incredibly simple, as in, “I don’t know why he perseveres with Denilson, he can’t pass, he can’t tackle, he can’t do anything. Better to play Diaby – at least he’s tall and can get in the way.”
2. Blame individual players - for example, Almunia or Denilson. Make it clear that they are utterly hopeless, and that everyone who has properly watched the game will clearly see that this is the case. It thus becomes an article of faith that anyone who doesn’t see this fact, was not watching the game, and therefore does not have a valid opinion. The awful players (in your eyes) are not fit to wear the shirt, and should never be allowed to play for Arsenal again.
3. Do not allow everyone to have own opinion. Rather than ever admit that there might be multiple opinions about a particular player, event or whole game, insist in all your writing that your opinion is the only possible conclusion that can be reached. Anyone who can’t see it is an idiot. A one line put down for someone speaking up for a player you are slagging off is the best way to deal with alternative perspectives. Your view is that it is possible to see the world through a singular pair of eyes. In which case anyone who disagrees is clearly not seeing the world as it should be. (Which is why it is also important to develop an incredibly pompous style).
4. Take as a starting point the vision that you know more than the manager, even if you have never managed a team, and never won the league title. Likewise take also as a starting point the fact that your views are not being put into effect as proof that the manager has lost it. Since there is only one right vision of the game, and you are expressing it, the manager is, by clear extension, a dope. Clearly you must know more about the players’ abilities than the manager even though you don’t see the players in training, because you are critical of the manager. In effect you have to take the vision that everything can be judged from the game. This has to be self-evident. What you must therefore deny is that a match can be part of the development of a side. So if you were there watching the first games of Bergkamp or Pires or Henry you would say, “they are rubbish, they can’t score, they can’t pass”, because if you watch those first games (in Pires’ case most of the first season) you will not see the players they became. Becoming and developing are not permissible. Everything is to be judged on the game today. If it is not right today, the player must go.
5. If the manager gets it right, argue that he should have done it before (on the grounds that you have been telling him). This again is part of the argument about being against development – if the manager believes that a player can develop and become better and better, you will not allow that. Since no one is right all the time, the manager will make mistakes, but since you are against all development, anyone who plays for the club and is not perfect has to go.
6. Never admit you were wrong. This is easy because you know you are never wrong. In fact, a short-term memory dysfunction is rather good here. Keep it simple. Insult anyone who disagrees with you, since your approach is obviously right. If you were part of the “Song’s not fit to wear the shirt,” brigade after the game against Fulham, just let that memory go, unless you really want to stand up against the crowd and say that Song is still no good. But be careful – go too far and you could look silly!
7. If we win well, say that we were lucky. If the defence shuts out the opposition, say that the opposition attack was weak and that we won’t be ok when we come up against real opposition. In short, when we win always say, “don’t kid yourselves.” Remind everyone of the defeats that have hurt all of us, and focus strongly on them. A good line would be, “You can’t seriously believe that an Arsenal team that can be beaten 3-0 at home is actually going to win anything.” It is important to ignore details.
8. Avoid statistics, especially such things that show in numbers that Denilson touches the ball more than other players, makes more passes than other players, has more successful intercepts than other players. If anyone else quotes stats then say, “you can prove anything with statistics.” Alternatively make some up – for example arguing that our attacking potential is clearly useless, when we are in fact joint top scorers in the league.
9. Always deny that you are part of the doom and gloom mob by saying that you are telling it as it is, and that anyone who suggests otherwise is being silly or stupid, or whatever insult you want. Call any blog that does not agree with you, “an unhealthy love-in”. But do not at any time have anything to do with humour. This is a serious matter and must be discussed seriously at all times.
10. Ignore all economic realities. Ignore the fact that Chelsea are run and owned by a Russian to whom the club is now £700m in debt. Ignore the fact that Manchester United are £750m in debt and have stopped paying interest on their borrowings. Ignore the fact that Liverpool are £350m in debt and the banks want their money back. Ignore the fact that West Ham are living in three month bursts as they wait every quarter for the courts in Iceland to decide how much longer they can live. Ignore the fact that a coup, economic downturn or simple bout of plain old boredom could leave Manchester City as much on the scrap heap as Portsmouth. Ignore all these and other economic truths, and insist that the only way to win anything is by buying some of the top players of the moment at current prices.
Now toddle off and write your blog.
(c) Tony Attwood 2009
Denilson is fustrating to watch,i’m confused about his role.
As a defensive mid he gets bullied off the ball easily and i don’t rate his tackling.
Most say Ramsey plays likes cesc but i think he’ll become a Gerard type player because he’s not scared to SHOOOOOOOOOOOT!,and a good box-to-box player.For me Denilson is more like Fabregas and not as a defensive mid.
Premiership defensive mids don’t get bullied easily!
PROVE ME WRONG DENILSON!!ALL OF AS!LOL!
Whoops!i meant to say ‘all of us’.
Come on arsenal!
Tim: I once commented that you can never qualify as a member of the D&G Brigade. You love the Arsenal and Arsene Wenger far too much to qualify. Besides, you put arguements logically, almost as good as we do here; even though I know that you hate some of Tony’s conspiracy theory (which is fine). Most of the Financial exposé that seemed crazy when first analysed here have all been out and become common knowlege now. The mysteries of Club Ownership was exhaustively discussed here. Some felt that it was all mere rantings. Look at what is happening now? The Notts County debacle is still unfolding for all to see.
So you see Tim, we do not classify people here. They sort of classify themselves; that’s their doing not ours. What Tony does first and foremost is provide unequivocal support to Arsene Wenger and the team. Consequently, we provide Arsenal Supporters an avenue to engage their intellect in a logical debate about their club in particular, and EPL football in general. In the process, some discoveries that at first seem crazy & illogical are unearthed, which are almost always proved to be correct in the end. After every loss, a witty article will be posted to help people release pent up tension and provide comic relief. So no one here will categorise you unless you categorise yourself.
If you notice when I come to your blogsite, I accord you the respect you deserve even though I may not agree hundred percent with all of your points. In any case I often agree with more than half, mostly because they are right. Sometimes some of your commenters may put a totally illogical comment just as some people come here to do every so often, but the general witty enjoyment is there to relax supporters. That’s all that is needed.
Unofficially, I am proud to be a member of the “Untold Arsenal Brigade” just as I am proud of you 7amKickers, even though I am not in America.
Denilson statistically better than Essien, Mascherano but being real, is he better on the field than Essien or Mascerano? Why is Brazil not playing him if he’s that great but prefers Lucas and Anderson? The answer is simple, he’s just not quality. It’s beyond belief for Arsene to travel all the way to Brazil only to bring in such an average player under an ‘exceptional talent’ entry visa?
Barbados;
Players get picked for their country by ONE man. Why didn’t Ian Wright play more for England?
And Lucas is NO WAY better than Denilson, I’ll fight anyone ’til I bleed on this subject.
“I think most of us have no problem whatsoever with someone like, say, Barbados above, thinking Denilson is poor and Diaby is a better option.”
He may be able to fool you Paul C, but those of us who recognise him and his various aliases from another blog know that Denilson is just the latest of his many irrational hate figures in the Arsenal team. He will move on to the next young, player to make it to the Arsenal first team soon enough.
One from many reasons why I have become addicted to this site is the fact that I can find myself mostly in what Tony tells us. When I first came to this site it was so refreshing and totaly different from others I was very annoyed the next day when I couldn’t find it back.
and must say the first thing I normally do when I go on the internet is first go to arsenal.com and then as fast as lightning to this blog.
I found it back with a little help from my friends
Not just for Tony but also for the very good comments that appear on this blog.
Someone mentionned the number of comments on this blog compared to others. Every animal its pleasure is a Flemish idiom and it means that every one has his own way to have fun and over here people mostly try to argue. This has an effect on the numbers of comments I think. I know that when I first came here and saw the articles and comments I was affraid to comment myself. I was thinking that I would tell complete nonsense and make a fool of myself. Well maybe I do, but no one seems to care.
In some other blogs they maybe get more comments but when I see comments like : “kabooooooom” or all the numbers from “1″ to “25″ or so… I really stop reading. But then again who am I to condem people who seem to enjoy this but then to compare the number of comments looks rather foolish I must say.
Now Denilson and Traore are out the next victims of the D&G brigade will be:
Diaby, Walcott and Silvestre. All not good enough to …. you know…
Barbados: Stop looking at facts in a lop sided way. Gilberto was overlooked until he was almost 25. Why? Simple! Brazil has so many talents that they sometimes do pick at random. How many times did Zico play for Brazil? Yet he was one of the most talented footballers ever to play the game. When did anyone here start to hear about Melo? Why did Brazil ignore him until then. Even Deco & Eduardo had to change nationality to play international football. So many other Brazillian are following suit. You seem to be forgeting that almost 98% of Liverpool fans hate your precious Lucas. Just go take a poll to find out, yet Benitez persisted in using him. Why? Because the manager can see what mere armchair fans cannot see. Contrary to your believe in this inglorious hype, Denilson is held in high regard by the current Brazil Manager. It was actually his whisper to Arsenal that led to Denilson being scouted. So, stop torturing yourself. Everyone knows that footballers reach their sharpest peak at 24/25, then they stop developing. At the moment, Denilson is getting better and better because he is still developing. Remind me, What’s his age again?
And the reason Denilson did not play for Brasil: Gilberto and Melo. As some may have noticed an ex Gunner and the worst purchase in Italy this season…..
Not sure whether I’m adding anything new – but a complete disregard of history is also useful if you wish to be a D&G. Arsenal have never got into debt in order to buy a player. Arsenal has always been a producer of players rather than a buyer of players. The first really successful side that most fans remember (and which may well have attracted them to the club in the first place) was the double winning team of ’71. It was overwhelmingly home grown with a few expensive additions. It’s always been like that and that policy has put us in a situation that just about all other clubs envy. A high relative level of success; a regularly full (big capacity) new stadium; a nontransfer-related debt that is easily manageable and declining on an almost daily basis. All achieved with owners who, heretofore, appear not to have any desire to take money out of the club in any major way. If you want instant and consistent gratification then supporting a different club every week (and doing so with 20/20 hindsight) is the only solution.
Without that, the Arsenal is the only logical option. Keep it up Tony!
What’s not to like?
Really we have a responsibility for our words though. The players may earn salaries in the stratosphere, but they are still human beings, so I personally believe it is wrong to make an accusation that you wouldn’t make to their face.
Lol, Denilson may be 21, but I’m sure he wouldn’t be over impressed by soome of the comments made here.
As a sidenote, I once had a conversation in a bar with a guy where I was joking about what a joke Scottish goalkeepers were. He challenged me on my attitude, and eventually I had to acknowledge that I was just parroting a media stereotype. I even conceded that the present keeper of that time was half decent. Lol, I realized the next day I had been speaking to Andy Goram.
Good to see you managed to extract your foot from your mouth mark! Talk about be careful what you say (and who you say it to!)
Judging by the number of comments you certainly seem to have put the cat amongst the chickens today Tony. Keep it up.
Well written Tony. I am probably a little OTT when it comes to being an AKB.
I agree that we need some CB coverage if Senderos leaves, but I don’t want any. I do not want some new bloke to stand in the way of Djourou. I would prefer to play Bartley or Ayling. And Nordtveit will be back next year.
It is difficult without RvP and Bendtner. But to sign Carlton Cole would be a nonsense. Why would he want to jeopardise his England chances by being third choice striker for Arsenal? I fear that Theo will not play in the World Cup due to a combination of injury and not being a first choice for the starting line up.
I can see the value of AA. In fact, I think he will become more influential in remainder of the season. But I would have preferred it if we hadn’t bought him. For the 4, occasionally 5, attacking berths, we had 2 bankers, Cesc and Robin; we now have 3. That means umpteen players are competing for 1 or 2 starting slots. Bendtner, Walcott, Eduardo, Vela, Rosicky and Nasri are all internationals. Walcott and Nasri need Arsenal games to make their international squads. They are likely to become unhappy unless our current run of injuries continues.
Could it be that I am an IKB attacking AW from the other side?
My two best Arsenal memories in the last few years were the way Cesc, Denilson and Diaby dominated the Chelsea midfield in the CC final, and Theo’s run against Liverpool. ( I loved the way that Theo described “hearing “ Anfield hold its collective breath the next time he got the ball, exhaling only when he passed it.) That we lost both matches is a so what.
From this morning’s Le Grove (which also states we need 5 new players)
“I hear from many of you that another blog chose to write a post about us again, guys thanks, but you are supposed to be writing about Arsenal not us, we appreciate the hero worship and we know you had a record 50 comments as a result, but the whole point of blogging about Arsenal is to talk about Arsenal. Thanks for the thoughts though. I didn’t read it by the way, so you’re wasting your time if you want me to name you, I won’t.”
Funny I thought their whole point was to slag off Arsene…
@Jonny: Their whole point is… I don’t know if they have a point, but supporting Arsenal they’re absolutely not doing. They’re trash fanblog really, as much as I don’t enjoy calling anything (even the real literal garbage. Okay I kid) trash. And they block sensible (ahem) comments indeed, they do those twats.
It’s somewhat unwise to go to forums when you’re very upset with an Arsenal loss. You’re very upset. People all around the forum are very upset. You say things about Arsenal you don’t usually think true in the heat of the moment. Other say crazy things too, your anger doubles in intensity, strengthens by others’ outrage. You’re starting to feel better about the loss and about yourself, so you leave the forums/blogs feeling better all over. Then you repeat the action, every time feeling better about the loss but you start to believe the bad things you and others say about Arsenal and consider them as everyday truth, start to love Arsenal less and less, and you keep coming back because you’re addicted to the self-serving bouts of anger you’re allowed to spout and nurture there.
That is someone else’s ‘theory’ about ‘rage’ in internet forums and actually not about football clubs let alone the Arsenal, but I think it kinda suits some of the doomers’ situation all right.
One point as this debate comes to an end, I thought the comment by Le Grove was most interesting.
My piece didn’t mention them at all, and in fact in writing it I was not thinking of them in any way. Irrespective of their attitude, whenever I read their site it is well written, and certainly doesn’t fall into all the points I was making in the article.
But their view that the piece was written in order to get them to mention the site that posted the original is a little more inward-looking and self-referential than I would have expected.
The article has been reprinted (mostly with acknowledgement) by a lot of other sites, so it obviously gave quite a few people a laugh – which was really my central intention.
Another group hug is in order I think.
The nonsense from Le Grove just confirms all we’ve said about them. Shallow, self-important loudmouths with nothing of value to say.
Tony Attwood might not say that but I will and I do. Le Grove….laughing s(t)ock.
I don’t comment on blogs and i do read le grove…
and i have to say that is one of the worst sites out there.If you dont agree with there view you are in AKB.
Well mate,Arsene know’s more than your dumb arse’s know, that’s for sure.
I think they could be tottenham suporters in disguise and agree with one of your posters about spud fans writing crap and trying to unsettle our fanbase.
I wish the people who do really love Arsenal for what they are…Stand up and outweigh these stupid voices.
Lg…
homophobic, anti-semitic, reactionary…fuelled by binge drinking, anti-intellectualism and a play ground bully mentality in search of sycophants who duly appear and grovel…and a thin, thin skin if anyone bites back, ban them…
the shame is P writes a good match report, always, his mind actually stays open…he needs to question his allegiances…
Tony;
I think we all know that u didn’t intent to write about any site in particular. But as usual, the PEOPLE who are exactly the ones we talk about get pissed and started throwin stones trying to find comfort by doing what they do best, spread the wrong words of wisdom to like-minded people. It’s more like a cult than a group of fans to me.
After, again, granting Denilson the poor lad the worst player on Arsenal history, they now say it’s Liverpool and not Arsenal who was the cause of the win. And yes, they said Arshavin was the sole good player on the pitch that night, and because he was bought in last Jan they used him as an excuse to buy more players.
I got a feeling that IF Arsene buys an accomplished player and we ended up winning a title they will say it is because of that buy, not Arsene and the other players.
I think they are the ones who truly lost the plot. Stupid smart arses….
what a steaming pile of dung that was – title? you’re all so deluded it’s unbelievable….
no heart, no desire – I would take the draw, but not THAT performance…